Monday, November 26, 2012
But! The fact that people I know and like are moving into a Village Woods condo is good news indeed. I didn't even tell them how crazy the board and president are. I did tell them which condos to avoid and how to not act like they're having any fun in the pool, which is right next to the President's condo.
GOD! Why can't people be happy! Like my with my new neighbors.
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
Like violence against women. Do you know anyone who's for that? What about rape? Anyone for that? No? Then stand with me.
On Feb. 14, 2013 I am joining One Billion Rising -- a global uprising to bring to light something that is not fun to talk about but that every person in the world would say he/she is against. And you don't even have to get the hat.
If you want more information, visit: 1BillionRisingSD.com or OneBillionRising.org
If you want the hat, visit www.cafepress.com/onebillionrisingsd
Thursday, August 30, 2012
And have fun we (for the most part) did. There were some bruised knees, my bottom hurt for a few days and one lucky unfortunate twisted a knee exiting the hard wood rink floor. Good news? The carpet landing was at least a little softer.
See the photos here... and you can watch the video below. Maybe the next time you are invited to an event called Roller Disco, you'll go...
Saturday, August 18, 2012
Sunday, August 5, 2012
Monday, July 30, 2012
That's right. These albums have been re-purposed as boxes, bowls and pencil holders. Finally, something to do with all those records.
To see for yourself, view the CoolRecordHolders website.
Saturday, July 14, 2012
See a reading of Mark Hiss' new play Talking Woman at 7:00 p.m August 11th, Twiggs Green Room.
Saturday, June 2, 2012
Sunday, May 13, 2012
The play itself is short – less than an hour – but every second of it brings something new, touching and uplifting. The story is real and often acted solo by the author, by Nilaja Sun. Some day, I’d like to see her do this because the rapid-fire exchange of dialogue is an amazing feat and this cast of 16 was working overtime as it was.
The play is narrated by Janitor Barron, in an extremely human and wizened portrayal by Rhys Green. Barron paints the picture of a school and a class full of kids who have already been left behind when the national No Child Left Behind brings its show to Brooklyn. Ms. Sun has been hired, through a department of education grant, to teach the worst of the worst kids a play. Lynae DePriest pretty much lives the pain, and pathos of this poor artist with an impossible task, and manages to instill hope. Another stand out in the cast is Justine Hince as the overwhelmed and finally consumed Ms. Tam. Watching her go from hopeful to disenchanted, to giving up is worth the price of admission.
It is at this point that a reviewer would explain that this production was an educational collaboration with actual students playing the actual students and professionals playing the adults in a way to soften the blow that the kids were blown away by the pros. But not so. These kids are possessed of so much energy, talent and emotion (and so much control over them all) that it is hard to understand that they are just beginning their careers as actors. The ensemble as a whole is even, competent and surefooted.
Standouts among the kids are Brandon Kelly as the angry young Jerome, Bianca Ostojich whose Shondrika can kill with a look, and Rebekah Ensley whose Cocoa puts hope into a much-too-common end to her high school studies.
The production team is also a combination of students and professionals and by-and-large they pull it off with nary a hitch. Directors Carla Nell and Kym Pappas have managed to create a strong, powerful cast that is surprisingly even, even as the emotions trickle, flow and sometimes gush. The only thing wanting is more sound design. There was too little musical accompaniment to follow up an excellent opening.
So what, you will think, wiping away tears, as the lights fade on an excellently-wrought “No Child…” After all, as Janitor Barron says, “sometimes the most talented ones just slip through the cracks.” All in all Mesa and InnerMission created an excellent production with an excellent use of student and professional actors, staff and technicians – and an excellent way to spend an evening. Just give yourself time to find the college, the parking lot and the theatre – watch this video for information on where to park.
InnerMission Productions and Mesa College present “No Child” by Nilaja Sun at Mesa College’s A Thursdays through Saturdays at 8:00 p.m. and Sundays at 2:00 p.m. through May 20. Tickets range from $10-15 and are available at InnerMissionProductions.org or Mesa College’s Apolliad Theater, 7250 Mesa College Dr., San Diego, CA, 92111. Building C-100 on this map.
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Saturday, March 31, 2012
Like my friend who had a war against the cable company. He thought it was OK to take cable from a company too lazy to protect its flow. When the cable company terminated the signal at the wires above his house, instead of right where he could tap in at the junction box, I asked him if the war was over. His reply, "It's no longer war. It's Jihad."
This was the 90s when Jihad simply meant living your life only to destroy your enemy. We have come to learn that the enemy of the Jihadists is the Infidel (us) and that we started it with the Crusades.
The term Holy War is possibly the funniest thing in human history. The idea that somehow the being charged with loving the world so much that He created it for us would stand for us killing people who don't believe in Him is ludicrous on so many levels...
War is not holy. No, war is personal. It began with tribes and it continues with tribes to this day. Or have you never lived in a mixed-use condominium complex? The idea about condos used to be to allow people who cannot afford to own a whole house or apartment building to own just one little bit. It was a way for these people to live together and own part of the building and share ownership of the common area. But now it's just a place for people to start and lose wars.
In my opinion, there is no winner in any war.
There are many reasons for Condos becoming war zones but my main pet peeve is people who used to believe in the condo model but who move out and rent to complete fucking morons. People who are in the mindset of an apartment and not a shared experience, people who don't care as much as owners.
My complex had flipped. Most of the units near me are owned by investors. Some of them are good about the people they rent to and others are keeping oddball family members there. Read my wife's blog on it.
The problem is that we have an enemy. One who doesn't believe in the idea of community property, personal space, hygiene... But we're against war.
Part of me wants to go all Jihad but it takes too much time i.e. the rest of my life. Like the Gerard Depardieu character in Green Card, part of me wants to tattoo the name of my upstairs neighbor on my forearm as a reminder that I need to kill that person and, once it's done, to have the tattoo artists draw a line through it...
The problem with that, besides how messy killing is, is that you have to live with it. Right there on your arm and in your heart. All war, holy or otherwise, just never goes away.
How to get a person to believe or leave, then? We've tried talking, note-leaving, appealing to the landlords and now we're appealing to the authorities and, possibly the legal system. And just that's going to leave a mark. Imagine the mark a war will leave.
All I want is what's best for everyone involved. For my wife and me to be able to sleep at night without hearing a whining, barking dog begging to be let out; for that dog to be owned by loving people who walk it and dote on it; for my upstairs neighbor to become a loving, intelligent member of society who is aware of the needs of other people.
I don't think war is going to solve this problem.
I guess I am ready for a miracle.
Friday, March 23, 2012
The hashtag #dousheybasket can be used to refer to anything you pay too much for, especially if you pay too much for it in order to look better to the people who shop at the Little Italy Farmer's Market.
Besides, no matter how hard you try my wife and I are the doushey-est people there.
It all started on a normal Saturday afternoon at the La Jolla Farmer's Market -- oddly the second doushy-est farmer's market in the county. Jennie wanted one of the robo-baskets that a nice European-looking woman was selling. We asked the price. $40.
After her pitch (it was made in Germany with strong materials and Eurpoean design touches and better engineering), we thought it was worth the price. Especially because it would complete our doushey traveling-to-farmer's-markets-ensemble: a Smart Car.
This became apparent when we went to the Little Italy Farmer's Market in the Smarty (only we can call it Smarty; because you don't own one, you have to call it The Smart Car). We tooled past all the Range Rovers, Fiats and Priuses; we popped into an impossibly small parking spot and -- the piece de resistance?
We opened the back window (you can do that with the touch of a button in a Smarty) and pulled out the $40 basket. We knew it was cool because people didn't look at us until after we'd passed. It was such a pleasure paying extra for things and putting them in out too-small, over-heavy and exorbitantly expensive Doushey Basket. How do we know we paid too much for it?
The only thing we do that hipsters don't do, apparently, is shop at Safeway, where we saw the very same basket for $9.
It's still worth it, though.
Saturday, February 11, 2012
Carla Navaro is also with the production company and also makes me happy with tied hands. She came to the audition and read for The Blood Countess and just sat in the tub and owned it. Please note that where wasn't a tub at the audition. I honestly believe she manifested the tub we now have her in. You will think we had it made for her. It is not easy to enter the show last -- and late at that -- then sit in a tub for a long time while setting the record straight. But Carla manages to to all that and more.
She is as much The Blood Countess as Erik is Janos, Justine is Darcy, Elisa is Dot, Brigette is Ilona and Tony is The Minister. Come see The Blood Countess, and these great actors. For more information, visit DangerHouse13.com. See you there!
Monday, February 6, 2012
There are many technical things going on in my new play, not the least of which is video. The characters in "The Blood Countess" communicate with one another on video. There's a screen on stage and a camera in the house. We will see if any of it works soon as we go into technical rehearsals and kick-start this mother. Until then, please look at the videos we've made up to this time wo whet your appetite for "The Blood Countess".
Blooper: director caught over-acting on an off-screen voice over shoot.
Making a statue: part one, we encase Carla Navarro in plaster.
Fundraising video: PS you can give money to this production here. Thanks!
Saturday, February 4, 2012
Monday, January 23, 2012
Saturday, January 14, 2012
A sociopath. No, really. She wakes up at 4:30 in the morning and sings. She lets the dogs bark and, worst of all, outside to poop and pee. Not bad, you say?
I say that outside is actually outside, not on the balcony, which the sociapath thinks is outside. The balcony is the roof to my patio. The pee and poop ferment there. When she washes up, rarely, all she does is wash said pee and poop into the rain gutter.
In the days before the Poop Waterfall, the doggie pee and poop would trundle down the rain guter and lay there just outside my patio. And smell. Don't ask me, ask the condo association. They could smell it and they were 10 feet from it. I live closer than 10 feet from it. This is impeeding with the safe, healthy enjoyment of the property I own.
And now, the pee and poop actually falls from the rain gutter that runs across my patio. Why?
Because it's clogged with dog shit, that's why! Dog shit. In the rain gutters. The water has to have somewhere to go so now it overflows onto my patio and, yesterday as I was prepping a $750 surfboard for resale, that water rained down on the board.
Like a fool, I put my hand in it and smelled. It smelled exactly like dog pee and god poop and it was raining down onto me, my patio and the surfboard I cannot sell. Because it smells like dog piss and dog shit.
I cannot sell my condo for the same reason. If I were a renter I'd just move out. I am actually in a financial position to rent the condo at a monthly profit. The only problem is that it would be unconsionable to rent the condo with the neighbor from hell living upstairs -- and probably impossible to sell it either.
And I am going to prove it. I have so many friends in Real Estate (fodder from another blog) and I am going to get all of them to weigh in on the rent-ability and sell-ability of this condo with the status quo. Then I'm going to have them write up their professional opinions as to how much I have lost by living downstairs from a woman who: a) wakes up at 4:30 a.m.; b) allows two dogs to bark at al hours of the night and day; c) lets her dogs relieve themselves on the patio; d) washes their excrement into my rain gutters causing a Poop Waterfall; and e) tells the maintenance company, who tell her she can't put dog poop in the rain gutters: "I don't have a dog."
This letter, and the expenses we've already racked up (insulation, cleaning the patio, therapy, that $750 surfboard I can't sell, etc.) are going to a lawyer. That lawyer is going to sue the owners of the condo above me who, if they're smart, will evict the stupid asshole who invented the Shit Waterfall.
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
Sunday, January 8, 2012
Thursday, January 5, 2012